I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
