He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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