Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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