well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
