My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
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