We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize