I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
