hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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