she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
