I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize