she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
