We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I want a musical about memes.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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