You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
