I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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