okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize