I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
soo... how was my night?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
