doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
