If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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