you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
You need Xanax blowdarts
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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