If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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