so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
