I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
