so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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