This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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