my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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