Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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