the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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