We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
