I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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