so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
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