he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
