I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
