I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
