We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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