Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
