Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Sorry about my life...
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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