i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
