problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
