Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize
