Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
