Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
