just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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