Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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