It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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