Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
