I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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