He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
