she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
