is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
