you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
