So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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