my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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